How to Host a Relaxed, Crowd-Pleasing Backyard BBQ

When I host a barbecue, I'm all about keeping things easy and low-key. To me, that means good food, relaxed vibes, and nothing too fussy — an approach I shared recently in an interview with Yahoo News on how to throw the best backyard barbecue.

I like to keep the menu simple but thoughtful, and I always plan to have at least two things hitting the grill—a protein and some veggies. It makes the spread feel a little more festive and keeps things fresh. Below is everything I've worked out over twenty years of hosting these: how much to buy, how to set up the yard, and what to do the day before so you're not stuck in the kitchen.

Jump to:

• How Much Food to Plan Per Guest
• My Go-To Main Dish: Kabobs
• Rounding Out the Menu
• Serving Style: Keep It Simple and Self-Serve
• Making Guests Feel Instantly at Home
• Easy, Laid-Back Decor That Still Feels Special
• Tableware That’s Simple, Stylish, and Practical
• Don’t Forget the Fun!
• Backyard BBQ FAQs

How Much Food to Plan Per Guest

The hardest part of hosting isn't the cooking — it's guessing how much to buy. Here's what I plan on.

Guests	Protein (raw)	Sides	Drinks	Ice
8-10	5-6 lb	5 lb total	40	20 lb
12-15	7-8 lb	7-8 lb	60	30 lb
20-25	12-13 lb	12 lb	100	50 lb

Here's how I plan for food and drinks:

• Protein: ½ lb raw per adult. For kabobs, plan two skewers a person at 4–5 oz each — kabobs run slightly higher than burgers because people take two without thinking about it. Especially if they have veggies mixed with the protein.
• Sides: about ½ lb per person total, spread across two or three. Three modest sides beat two enormous ones.
• Drinks: two in the first hour, one per hour after. Four per person covers a typical afternoon. I like to put out a pitcher or dispenser of water and I don't count that in my drink count.
• Ice: 2 lb per person when it's hot — that's for chilling and serving. This is the number everyone gets wrong. If it's really hot and your ice will melt quickly, always have a bag or two as back up in the freezer. Hostess Tip: Make sure you prechill your drinks before you put them on ice. This helps it melt slower.
• Buns: 2 per person if you're doing burgers or dogs.
• Dessert: 1.5 servings per person if they're on the small side.

Keep in mind:

• Kids: they eat less than adults. I would cut their portions in ½. Or offer kid specific options and count them as one.
• Appetizers: if you're putting out a veggie tray (or chips and dip) before the grill fires up — which I always do — people eat noticeably less protein. Round down.

My Go-To Main Dish: Kabobs

If I had to pick one main dish to serve, kabobs are my hands-down favorite. They’re perfect for a crowd, super versatile, and the best part? You can prep everything the day before. That means less time in the kitchen and more time with your guests.

Kabobs work for just about any dietary preference—steak, chicken, shrimp, or totally plant-based, there's something for everyone. I like to use a universal marinade that works across the board, so I don’t have to overthink it. Pro tip: grill-ready skewers make cooking so much easier and look amazing served up on a big platter. Instant wow factor.

Rounding Out the Menu

I like to balance the grilled mains with something refreshing, like a watermelon salad with mint and feta. A simple fruit salad or bountiful veggie platter is always a win, too. For heartier sides, I’ll go with baked beans or mac and cheese—always the mac and cheese if kids are coming! And if you’re not making it from scratch, no shame: I love grabbing the one from Costco, transferring it to a nice dish, heating it up, and topping it with crumbled bacon. It’s always a hit.

Serving Style: Keep It Simple and Self-Serve

For backyard gatherings, I go full buffet style (don't miss my tips on how to set up a buffet table). It’s casual, easy to manage, and lets people help themselves. I usually prep my table in advance and map out where everything will go. Recently, I’ve been serving chips in baskets with little plastic scoops—it’s a small touch that somehow feels elevated.

For dessert, mason jar treats are my go-to. Pies, dump cakes, strawberry shortcake—they’re easy to prep ahead, easy to serve, and feel like a little treat. I keep them chilled inside and bring them out after dinner so guests can grab one when they’re ready.

Quick tip: If you’re serving anything cold (like pasta salad or fruit) and it’s hot outside, tuck some flat ice packs under your tablecloth to help keep things fresh a little longer.

Making Guests Feel Instantly at Home

One of my favorite ways to welcome guests is by giving them something to do right away. I’ll point them to the drink station and make sure there’s something to snack on. It takes the pressure off the host and helps people ease into the gathering naturally.

I always have drinks and light bites ready before anyone shows up. Sometimes that means lemonade, iced tea, and water on a tray; other times I’ll mix up a signature cocktail that’s ready to pour (like these pineapple margaritas!). For snacks, I keep it simple—bowls of pretzels or nuts on the table, chips and guac, or a veggie tray. Don’t forget the kids! Make sure there’s something fun for them to munch on too.

The Details That Make the Difference

It’s the little things that make guests feel truly cared for—nothing over-the-top, just thoughtful touches.

I like to have a basket of blankets out in case it gets chilly, and I always set up a “help yourself” basket with sunscreen and bug spray. If I’m serving canned drinks, I’ll add a little basket of koozies nearby. And one of my favorite touches? A tiny bud vase with fresh flowers in the bathroom guests will use. This brings a little of the backyard inside. It’s a five-second thing that makes a big impact.

Easy, Laid-Back Decor That Still Feels Special

Decorating for a backyard BBQ doesn’t have to be complicated. I always start by flipping on the market lights—the warm glow instantly makes everything feel festive. I also love adding solar lanterns with fun cut-out patterns. They charge during the day and light up at dusk without any effort. I recently added some daisy-punched metal solar lanterns to the yard, and they cast the prettiest shadows. Instant cozy vibes.

For the table, I keep it natural and unfussy. I’ll clip some herbs or greenery from the yard and pop them into mason jars or little terracotta pots. If I’m grabbing flowers from the store, I stick to one color and use two types for a clean, cohesive look.

Tableware That’s Simple, Stylish, and Practical

When it comes to serving, I keep things super practical but still pretty. I have a stash of plain white platters and bowls—they go with any setup and make everything look pulled together. For plates and utensils, I love using biodegradable bamboo. They’re eco-friendly, sturdy, and give that relaxed, rustic vibe that just feels right outside.

The bamboo sets come in different shapes and sizes, which is great when your menu has variety. Bonus: they actually hold up with heavier food, unlike some flimsy disposables. I also found a glass beverage dispenser that stacks—perfect for serving tea in one and lemonade in the other. It makes the drink station feel instantly polished.

Don’t Forget the Fun!

Great food and conversation are the heart of any party, but I like to have a few low-key activities around to keep things lively. We have a bocce court, so I’ll set out the balls and let people jump in as they like. Cornhole and giant Jenga are always a hit, especially with the kids.

Sidewalk chalk is a no-fuss option for little ones, and if I want to mix things up, I’ll bring out a tabletop game. Lately, we’ve been loving Classic Lawn Bowling—we play it on our backyard bocce court, the grass, and even take it to the beach!

When the sun goes down, we always like to start a fire in our solo stove (above under the jenga). It lights so quick and has very little smoke.

Backyard BBQ FAQs

A great backyard BBQ doesn’t have to be complicated. With a little prep, some simple touches, and a relaxed mindset, it’s easy to create something that feels both effortless and memorable.